If we’re lucky, at some point in our lives we have places where we feel deeply welcome, we feel like we belong. And likely we’ve experienced other places where our belonging feels. . . not quite there. How would a newcomer know they belong at First Parish Framingham? Or in Unitarian Universalism? Using the Buddhist concept of the near enemy, we explore what sneaky, hard-to-recognize obstacles can undermine not only an authentic sense of belonging in our congregations and faith tradition, but can undermine Unitarian Universalism itself.